An unemployed “winner” in the Seattle area is behind bars after making his teenage girlfriend sign a bizarre “abuse contract.” Graydon Smith, 31, forced his 19 year old pregnant girlfriend to sign a contract that allowed him to punch, kick, and choke her anytime he felt like it. Within the contract he did place one restriction on himself; he couldn’t hit or kick her in the stomach. See, Graydon Smith’s “abuse contract” was just overflowing with compassion.

The 19 year old woman, whose name hasn’t been released, was seen by her father in law being choked by Smith. He called the authorities and that’s when they made the arrest. They soon learned of Graydon Smith’s “abuse contract.”

The usual took place in the relationship. He was abusive, she was afraid to leave for fear of her life; unfortunately for the teenage mother to be she knew that Graydon Smith had no intention of stopping his abusive behavior mainly because of the strange contract that he made her sign. Here’s another take on the story sure to make libs mad.

The teen was bleeding from her face and had a contusion on the back of her head when authorities arrived at the couple’s home in Seattle. Smith tried to assault her father-in-law but evidently his ability to actually hit a man isn’t that great. He simply delivered a glancing blow to the man’s face.

Like I said above, the guys a real winner. Here you can see that Ron Jeremy (the famous porn actor) is his hero. Also Seattle is where he battles. On Facebook he tells us that his relationship status is complicated. I’m guessing it’s even more complicated these days.

Graydon Smith has been charged with second-degree assault, two counts of fourth-degree assault, and felony harassment. He should probably be charged with abject stupidity; Graydon Smith’s “abuse contract” is evidence enough of that.