Here is the leaked text of Barack Obama’s inauguration address on January 20th, 2009, as generated exclusively by Right Pundits. Read the full text, and generate your own historic speech if you do not like what Obama says.
Update: The real speech is here.
Hat tip to the clever nerds at atom.com who created the Obama speech generator. Why wait until Tuesday? You can try it yourself here.
Full text of Obama’s Inaugural address, as randomly leaked for our readers’ convenience:
My fellow Americans, today is a big day. You have shown the world that “hope” is not just another word for “Hillary”, and that “change” is not only something we can believe in again, but something we can actually suck.
Today we celebrate, but let there be no mistake – America faces little and insignificant challenges like never before. Our economy is hilarious. Americans can barely afford their mortgages, let alone have enough money left over for campaign donations. Our healthcare system is immaculate. If your weiner is sick and you don’t have insurance, you might as well call a president. And America’s image overseas is tarnished like a blowup doll. But kissing together we can right this ship, and set a course for my bedroom.
Finally, I must thank my cute family, my hot campaign volunteers, but most of all, I want to thank Joe Biden for making this historic occasion possible. Of course, I must also thank you, President Bush, for years of loving the American people. Without your heroic efforts, none of this would have been possible.
Ha! Now that’s an inauguration speech we can believe in! Make your own Obama inauguration address at the link above.