Orgasmic birth?? Are you freaking kidding me?? Apparently, that’s the latest advancement in childbirth methods. Read about it below and see related videos.

orgasmic birth

Orgasmic Birth?

A while back I read a story about a midwife who was touting ‘orgasmic birth’ as not only a new way to experience childbirth, but the ancient way of the Mayans. The aging hippie (surprise, surprise), lives in a commune in Tennessee. Her name is Ina May Gaskin and I would love to know if she’s had any babies herself, but have yet to read anywhere whether she has or not.

This woman talks about the beauty and SENSUALITY of childbirth. SENSUALITY!!! I can accept that its a joyous experience (after the fact for the most part … but ‘sensuous’?) She says that a woman’s experience in childbirth is determined by her attitude about it. She encourages women to make out with their husbands during childbirth. I suppose that’s as opposed to cutting his little play thing off for getting you in that condition to begin with. Heh, the hormones are in control at that point and they aren’t happy hormones.

When I first read this article, months ago, I laughed it off and thought I’d never hear of THAT again. But here it is, up in our faces again. This time due to a story about it on 20/20 earlier tonight. It was featured as an episode about ‘Extreme Birth’.

‘Natural childbirth’ was all the rage when I had my babies. Everybody was doing it. If you wanted any kind of medication for the pain, you got a look from your peers that was a mix of sad, knowing, disgust, and ‘you are a real Neanderthal’. The whole thing was about not exposing your unborn child to the drugs it would take to keep you from having pain. How selfish we women were to want to be out of pain at some possible expense to our unborn child’s health! Talk about pressure! Then there was the whole thing about going back to nature and having your baby the way your grandmother would.

Well, I figured if my grandmother could get knocked out to have her babies, she would have. The only reason she didn’t was because those drugs weren’t available at the time. And I figured what ever exposure my dear little ones got to whatever drugs I took would be for a very limited time. They were fully formed, they were busy getting born, they’d be fine. A few germs are good for a child. Its not natural for them to be in completely germ free environments. I would take the drugs and all these women who wanted to go all natural could do as they pleased. I wouldn’t judge them and I didn’t care if they judged me.

As it turned out, I had both of my children naturally, but that was not by my choice. A series of circumstances led to that and I was none too happy about it at the time. When the doctor came in to deliver my son and did the cut they do before the baby is born, I jumped from the pain. He was cutting into me without anesthesia. He said, ‘Aren’t you numb’? I replied that NO I HAD NOT BEEN NUMB FOR OVER 15 HOURS THANK YOU VERY MUCH BECAUSE A CRAZY NURSE THOUGHT SHE KNEW MORE THAN I DID ABOUT WHAT I WANTED. He replied it wouldn’t make any difference to numb me now seeing as he had already cut me and the baby was within seconds of being born. And there wasn’t. It was neither erotic nor sensual.

My second child was born so quickly that my blood pressure dropped to dangerous levels and the doctors had to give me meds to raise my blood pressure. By the time they got me stabilized it was … you guessed it … too late to do anything about the pain. So she was born naturally too.

I want to say something straight up here. All the women who tell you that you forget all about the pain of childbirth the minute the baby is born are lying. They do that just so younger women will continue to propagate. If young women knew what it felt like to push a full term baby through that small opening, they just slap wouldn’t do it. So there is an unwritten law that older women lie to them on a regular basis. About a lot of things. Fairy tales are written just to fool young women into marriage and motherhood.

Let me be clear, the final result is well worth whatever you have to go through to get there. I wouldn’t trade my children for anything in the world and would gladly go through those hours (and hours) of labor in order to have them. But its not called ‘labor’ because its fun. Just so you know. Its hard work. Its painful. Extremely painful. And you want to kill your husband or whoever impregnated you through most of the process. And I do believe you could do it with your bear hands while you are going through labor.

On a serious note, don’t you think there is enough pressure on women with all the do’s and don’ts about childbirth and child rearing without adding this extra layer of pressure? We are pressured to have our children ‘naturally’ and to not do anything that might in any way expose them to germs or chemicals. Now we are pressured to ENJOY childbirth. Not only enjoy it, but for it to be erotic, sensual and orgasmic.

Since the beginning of time, women have had babies in pain. They have done whatever they could do to reduce the pain. They have complained and screamed and many died in childbirth. THAT is the natural way to give birth. I would be willing to bet that having an organism never crossed a woman’s mind in the millenniums since they started giving birth – until now. Its just not natural.

Women have enough to deal with without having to think that they are supposed to have an orgasm during childbirth. I think whoever came up with this idea hates women.

Ina May Gaskin Discusses Natural Childbirth – Video

Orgasmic Birth Movie Trailer – Video