Mini nuclear plants are coming to a neighborhood near you within the next five years. Read about it below.
Scientists at Los Alamos, the same place that produced the first atomic bomb, have announced that mini nuclear reactors will soon be available to provide clean, safe energy for neighborhoods. The mini nuclear plants are a little smaller than the average garden shed and will be available for sale in about five years. They will cost about $25 million apiece. That means, if you chip in with about 10,000 of your neighbors and friends, you can have 10 years worth of energy for a mere $250!!! The mini nuclear reactors will be available through the New Mexico based Hyperion Nuclear Power Generation Company.
Don’t worry. Its safe.
‘You could never have a Chernobyl-type event – there are no moving parts,’ said Deal. ‘You would need nation-state resources in order to enrich our uranium. Temperature-wise it’s too hot to handle. It would be like stealing a barbecue with your bare hands.’
This is a great solution to all sorts of problems. No more worries about the the new U.S. President bankrupting the coal industry. Most of Pennsylvanians and West Virginians will be out of work and starving to death, but they won’t be polluting the atmosphere with nasty coal products!
Another nice bi-product of these mini reactors is that if Barack Obama succeeds in his gun control policy of disarming Americans, we will have these mini nukes to turn to. With American ingenuity, we’ll figure out how to weaponize those babies in no time flat.
Of course, that’s assuming American ingenuity still exist after all motivation for work has been removed by the socialization of our country.