Yesterday, the judge in the John Edwards trial called a halt to jury deliberations. As we know, the ex-Presidential candidate, ex-Vice Presidential nominee, and ex-Senator, is on trial for corruption, which is presumably legalese for being a despicable excuse for a human being. Why did the judge have to stop the jury? Well, some guys just can’t keep it in their pants, even when they’re on trial.
It turns out that the four alternate jurors have been showing up for the last several days in identically-colored outfits…the same color, coincidentally, as Mr. Edwards tie. Also, it turns out that the defendant and one of these alternates have been playfully engaging each other throughout the trial, which may be against the rules. To quote the Washington Post, ‘One of the alternates, an attractive young woman, has been spotted smiling at Edwards and flipping her hair in what seems to some to be a flirtatious manner. On Friday, she wore a revealing red top with a single strap and an exposed right shoulder.’
The flirtation has become so obvious that eventually even the judge caught on. I’m guessing that this sort of situation doesn’t typically turn up in trials, but I don’t watch the Court Channel so I’m not sure. So the judge has had to meet with the attorneys to try to figure out a solution. If he declares a mistrial, then the feds would have to begin anew. They would have a difficult time keeping women off of the jury solely based upon gender considerations. And apparently women can’t constrain themselves around this guy. Heck, he could get lucky at Lilith Fair.
Now, let’s try to figure out what the hottie on the jury is thinking. She’s been sitting there for weeks, watching evidence of what a loathsome person John Edwards is. But this just turns her on all the more. At the beginning of the trial, I had written a piece where I had found a poll that Edwards’ approval rating was 3%. I’m thinking that a lot of women just don’t like to admit that they find this churlish character appealing, but in reality he’s everything that they’ve been looking for. Perhaps this is what Eva Braun was thinking… ‘Oh, Adolph isn’t so bad; I think he’s a fixer-upper.’
May 26th, 2012 at 6:04 am
“one of the alternates, an attractive young woman, has been spotted smiling at Edwards and flipping her hair in what seems to some to be a flirtatious manner. On Friday, she wore a revealing red top with a single strap and an exposed right shoulder.”
Maybe we should look into her bank account as well ?
There was also an old guy with is balls hanging out the bottom of his short shorts all the way to his knees, just as red as Edwards face.
And then there was Sharon Stone, sitting right up front and center of thr judge./
Legally he might be innocent. But I doubt any of his next (if any) relationships will last longer than it took to typist
May 27th, 2012 at 3:33 am
Just proves that some women like ‘bad men’. This is why Newt Gingrich should have played up his bad-boy image.
May 27th, 2012 at 4:01 am
Andy..Problem is, with that mayonaisse made physic he’ll hes lucky if he resembles a ball of fresh snot on a sidewalk.
With that said he’d still be a much better president,
Callista
May 27th, 2012 at 7:58 am
Ahh Right Pundits, I used to blog here years ago.
May 27th, 2012 at 2:32 pm
“mayonaisse made”
take it back!
anything is better than Obama’s cocaine and fois gras body.